promotion

yesterday the list of invitees for promotion to next grade was published. In State Bank the list is called "zone of selection"..and i am not IN.

i have seen many reality shows where they show people NOT IN..and almost all were in tears..straining to cover up their heavy hearts..and they are asked to speak..everyone thanks for all the support they got ..people say luck played..

i always tried to do my best.. almost all my bosses have been publicly acknowledging the hardwork which many a time have got them accolades..
But recently i was able to see my 'secret file'..where your Confidential Reports are filed..
Many of them say 'hardworking, intelligent ..."
One of my close friend who became my boss .."An inteligent Officer but at times cannot be depended"

Another Regional Manager, who dictated my Review for promotion, wrote "i don't agree to points 2 and 3 of Branch Manager..(points 2 and three were of something like hardworking and intelligent".. But he frequently telephoned and talked to me

Many gave me only "Good" rating and which insiders call "Good for nothing"

My postings were all tough ones, First was in Madayi (where you will get only fish and people look down upon you when you say you are a vegetarian - ) The at Pappanamcode Industrial branch with the demanding Regional Research Laboratory on one hand and the number of SSI units within the oldest Industrial Estates in Kerala and having the largest Lock and Key Godowns..and from there with the Association's interferences i was posted to Parassala (where people do not like to go because no books were tallied for 2 years (and again this was inadvertently omitted to be included in such a list to the Board).

Then at Calicut Palayam i had to work with heavy heart due to my mother's sudden death and my manager's recommendation and my request to the Late Murali (the great neta) for a transfer to somewhere near Trivandrum - was thrown to dusbtin and instead i was transferred to Zonal Office, calicut where a new region was formed and we had to build a new regional office from scratch...

My posting as Manager PSB at Tripunithura was changed to Manager C&I for fitting another neta and at tripunithura there was only one C&I - the KEL a govt unit. There also we had to work hard to change the stagnant level of 40 crores for the past 3 years and in the third year we achieved 95 crores and trend was set..

But again i was posted to cherthala as PSB with no assistants, with daily three to five loans and inspections and follow up..and with 1 crore Sahaya varsha..

Again the DGM wanted to post me to Ambalapuzha branch and again Association wanted to post somebody else and i landed at Ramankary..and still we worked as a team and i was awarded very good score by my Regional Manager ..My transfer request to be with my family saw dustbin again..and i was retained...
The new regional manager felt that my achievement of 150% of budget was not to be considered as an achievement..The first time the branch had got operating profit and with two big social circle events..i felt that i should have been more inactive..The AGM is asking my customers "how much did you give him" and when it reaches my ears..i am helpless..how can i convince him ...


my mind goes in search of all stories i have heard to console me...See Mr rajamoni....see mr mukundan..and who all...and to the astrologers saying that your Mars is in a bad position and your Saturn is working against you...

My DGM comes and says "sorry better luck next time" and your friends who are in the list throws a sympathetic smile and i say goodluck to them and

some say Oh that "Ramankary"..

Even my wife tries to build up cheers in me saying why don't you resign...it is better to work day and night in Muthoot rather than SBT..

No tears ...i am trying to read "lalitha sahasranamam"

I try to remember a wall hanging in a Doctor's house..

I asked for..... but God did not give...
I asked for......God did not give

But God gave me alot of things that i didn't ask for..

Still in some corner of my mind...

a tear drop falls down into oblivion..